If you are in my Sunday School class- my apologies…you’ve heard this before. But it’s been on my heart and mind all day long and I just need to write it out. As I’ve said before, writing is therapeutic for me, so either join the therapy session, or feel free to browse elsewhere. 🙂
Consider carrying a child in your own womb,
Birthing that child,
Wiping tears from his eyes,
then watching him die at the hands of the coldest of Roman hearts.
I am sure some of you reading this have felt the grief of losing a child- whether one your eyes were privileged to see, or simply one that the very depths of your womb knew and loved…
But I have not, praise be to God, had to feel that ache, that emptiness.
But Mary did. After Mary was told she would carry the Messiah, she said in Luke 1:48 that from that point on, all generations would call her “blessed.”
Blessed to love so deeply and lose so greatly? To watch your own child, a walking extension of your own heart, die. Brutally die.
As I sat in Sunday School this morning, I thought to myself, “That’s not my idea of blessed. Yes, she was privileged to carry and to know the Messiah- the Savior of her soul and the souls of all who will receive Him. But blessed? I don’t know about that…”
Immediately I was reprimanded in my heart. The Holy Spirit convicted me so greatly…
How quickly I would turn my back on Him- to say that I am only blessed in the good times, the times when I think things are easy and “right.”
I believe with all of my heart that if Mary could come into my living room right now, and sit on my couch with me for some girl talk, she’d say something like this….
I know that it doesn’t seem to make sense…that the grief I was called to bear is just too much. It seems to you now that a Mother’s heart could never bear so much. But I am telling you from the bottom of my heart, the heart of the mother of Messiah, that it was worth it. His birth, His life, and yes, even His death- blessed beyond measure.
Oh to have a heart that sees the blessing in the pain. That doesn’t turn and run from the only One who can show the meaning and bring healing. To be like Mary just a little bit more…and to believe firmly that my calling, no matter the cost, is my blessing.